I’M SURE I’VE GOT MEASLES
I’M COVERED WITH SPOTS
ONE MINUTE I’M FREEZING
THE NEXT I’M HOT
AND WHAT WITH AMNESIA, SNEEZING
WHO KNOWS WHAT
THEY’VE YET TO DISCOVER
ALL I’VE GOT

I NEED MEDICATION
I’M COVERED IN HIVES
I’VE GOT PALPITATIONS
I’M BARELY ALIVE
THEY’VE TESTED FOR PLAGUE, LUMBAGO
AND DRY ROT
THEY’VE YET TO DISCOVER
I’VE GOT THE LOT
THEY’VE YET TO DISCOVER
ALL I’VE GOT

OH, WITH MY HOUSEMAID’S KNEE
AND MY PIGEON TOES
MY BACK IS WRACKED WITH PAIN
AND NOW MY EYES ARE STINGING
OH, WITH MY ATHLETE’S FOOT
AND MY PARSON’S NOSE
I’VE WATER ON THE BRAIN
AND NOW MY EARS ARE WRINGING WET

IT’S LIKE I’VE GOT LOCKJAW
THAT’S JUST HOW IT FEELS
I’VE BEEN TO THE DOCTOR
THREE TIMES A DAY AFTER MEALS
AND WHAT WITH ST. VITUS DANCE
AND WRITER’S BLOCK
THEY’VE YET TO DISCOVER
I’M LIKE NO OTHER
WILL I EVER RECOVER
PROBABLY NOT!
THEY’VE YET TO DISCOVER
ALL I’VE GOT

(c) R.E.Good 2003